Where Blue Birds Fly.

do you feel shitty and downright depressed after knowing that the guy that you really like loves someone else? basically how do you feel when you found out that he likes someone else? i mean previously you were thinking, pondering, wondering and scratching your head until the scalp almost fell off about what kind of dating game he's playing but then today, okay, one fine day you found out that he was basically hitching a ride from you emotionally.

in the midst of confusion and self inflicted compulsion, you wished so dang much for a clear blue sky with sun shining bright in the air to clear away the dark clouds. so there. truth be told, he's in love. now, things started to fall into places and gives you a birds eye view of things that were bothering your left brain. call me a scatterbrain.

what would you feel?

one thing's for sure, having to check myself that is. i feel fine. i feel better. even though he loves someone else. yes, lurv. i suppose i already forgotten about half the things that we did together and the times that we had together. i suppose before i got to know about the truth, i've already in the process of getting over him and hell yeah, a success. i am fucking proud of myself.

even though he could be just fucking me for the sake of it, he could just be looking for a temporary stop before getting on that same wagon and continue his journey, he could just be playing with my feelings. to sum it all, i could just be his another whore. fucktard.

hold on, a success? or was it just depression turned inward?

oh well. *shrugs*

i guess you just have to roll along with it. the tears, the pain, the disappointments, the rejections, you just go along with it. life still goes on. it does really. perhaps for my case, i have to learn things the hard way. and now i can only have memories of pain and desires to look back on and say this proudly. "I've survived!"

i can rest my case and start anew.

[music]
Lifehouse - Breathing